Ten Knucklehead Zingers

1.  

Work Less - Expect More!

Here's a real winning philosophy: I'll work harder when I get a raise." Sorry knucklehead, you'll get paid more when you work harder! Life is a cause and effect relationship. You first must earn what you want BEFORE you receive it. You must pay the price IN ADVANCE for every opportunity or goal you are interested in obtaining.

2.  

Simon Says!

Who the heck is Simon anyway, and why should you do what he says. Living ON PURPOSE is your primary responsibility. Don't do what your Mom, Dad, teacher or friends say what you should be doing and by all means don't listen to some dope named Simon. Pay attention, listen to the still small voice inside your heart and throw everything you've got at it.

3.  

Where's Waldo?

You've got your own problems to be worrying about where Waldo has been hanging his hat. The key question is where do I currently stand in relation to where I want to be. Identify the gap, analyze the gap, and then close the gap!

4.  

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

Who cares? What does matter though is WHY you are pursuing what you're pursuing. If your only response to that question is either, "I don't know" or worse yet, "Just because" than you really are a knucklehead and deserve what you get for such a lamebrain approach to life.

I do have a suggestion however; when you hear yourself repeat the words, "I don't know", or "Just because" go to the nearest open door and place your head in the frame, then invite the first 5 people that come along to slam your head with the door!

5.  

Chronic Lateness Syndrome

One thing you can count on from a Knucklehead is their consistency in being late for just about any meeting. They are an equal opportunity offender and THIEF of others time, and patience.

Knuckleheads are not the sharpest knives in the drawer; they waltz in late, apologize profusely and insist that this incident was highly unusual. They are never, ever late they say. The victim of their excuse finds the knucklehead amusing because experience has shown them to be late for everything. Let's cut to the quick on this issue. Being chronically late is irresponsible, unprofessional, and is a significant factor in annoying those that have been on time.

6.  

Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut

Sometimes you don't! However when it comes to bringing home the bacon, the only thing that matters is results. So whether or not you feel enthusiastic, I suggest you take your best acting lesson, put on a smile and do what needs to be done. Smile even if it hurts!

7.  

Tastes Like Chicken!

The only thing that tastes like chicken is chicken. And the only thing that tastes like success is success. To achieve your goals you must be decisive, disciplined, and determined to do what's necessary to get the job done. Interested in knowing what failure, quitting and mediocrity tastes like? Think of a four-letter word that starts with "C" and ends with "P". Yeah, you've got it! That's exactly what it tastes like.

8.  

Who Cut The Cheese!

You not only stink it up when you fail to do your best work, you also bring that baggage and rotten reputation along with you. You can't build a solid reputation and strong professional credentials on a foundation of excuses, procrastination, lateness, mediocre work, and a less than cheerful disposition.

9.  

Make Your List and Check it Twice!

Santa Claus isn't the only one who has this solid piece logic figured out. Winners are sure to check their work, and test their assumptions. This has nothing to do with being naughty or nice, but everything to do with success and failure, about being a professional or an amateur. Plan in advance and double check your work - always!

10.  

Say "Uncle!"

Knuckleheads go down with the ship. High achievers know when to cut their losses and move on. They lick their wounds, heal quickly and produce the desired results they want. Knuckleheads on the other hand wind up in the morgue or life support. There comes a time when quitting and walking away is the smartest thing to do!